Wondering if Your Child's Behavior Is Typical?

Typical Behavior:

Behaviors that are expected for a child's age and developmental level and occur as children mature and learn new skills. They commonly improve with time.

Many challenging behaviors are a normal part of childhood. The key is recognizing when behaviors become unusually frequent, intense, or interfere with everyday life. This guide can help you understand the difference.

  • Occasional tantrums

  • Temporary defiance

  • Sometimes loses their temper

  • Tests limits

  • Expresses emotions through crying

  • Usually responds to guidance

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Atypical Behavior:

A persistent pattern of behavior that is outside the expected range for a child's age and developmental level and may interfere with daily functioning.

  • Frequent or prolonged tantrums

  • Severe aggression toward others

  • Self-injury

  • Behaviors that interfere with school or friendships

  • Repetitive or unusual vocalizations

  • Emotional reactions that seem extreme for the situation

How can parents help change typical child behavior?

While children rarely want to change their behavior, parents can:

1. Share clear expectations for behavior ahead of time

2. Give more attention to good behaviors

3. Respond calmly and consistently to misbehaviors

This helps kids learn that good behavior “works” better than

acting out.

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Practical strategies for promoting emotional regulation:

  • Help Your Child Recognize Their Feelings

    Teach your child to notice the early signs of frustration or anger before emotions become overwhelming. Practice calming strategies together, such as deep breathing, counting, or taking a short break.

  • Validate Their Emotions

    Let your child know that their feelings are real and accepted, even when their behavior needs guidance. Naming emotions ("I can see you're frustrated" or "It looks like that change was really upsetting") helps children build emotional awareness.

  • Offer Choices

    Providing simple, structured choices gives children an appropriate sense of control while keeping expectations clear. For example, "Would you like to do homework first or have a snack first?"

  • Encourage Breaks

    Teach your child that it's okay to ask for a break when they feel overwhelmed. A short pause can prevent frustration from escalating and helps build healthy self-regulation skills.

  • Create a Calm Space

    Designate a quiet, comforting area where your child can go to relax and regulate their emotions. This space should be a supportive tool—not a punishment.

  • Respect Self-Regulation Strategies

    If your child uses behaviors such as stimming to regulate themselves, allow these behaviors when they are safe and appropriate. Self-regulation is an important part of emotional well-being.

  • Model coping skills

    When your child pushes your buttons, show them it’s OK to take a moment to breathe and make a plan before responding.

    Example: “I’m overwhelmed. I need to take a minute.”